Tag Archives: film

Smells like hurl: Cloverfield

Big Scary Monster

Monster movies aren’t really my shtick, unless they happen to be cheesy “B” monster movies that make me laugh, or something like Jurassic Park, which at least has a sort of scientific edge to it, if an implausible one. So, the Cloverfield trailers that appeared on TV a while back did not move me.

Something about the storyline turned me off: a group of trendy young people from New York flee an impossible, gargantuan lizard. Too deep for me.

Technicolor YawnWorse yet (or “better yet” in the view of many), much of the production was filmed with a camcorder (“reality” cinema, you know), generating lots of deliberately herky-jerky, topsy-turvy footage. Think: The Blair Witch Project Meets Godzilla. Or maybe Godzilla meets the Tilt-a-Whirl.

I can feel that larcenous, piss-injected popcorn coming up, just thinking about it.

In all fairness, maybe it’s a great movie.* If you like that sort of thing. However, it seems that Cloverfield has been inducing genuine nausea in some people – a result of the “dynamic” nature of the “cinematography.” So, if you should go to see the big lizard chasing the hipsters and generally making a mess of New York, despite the proliferation across this nation of high performance military jet-aircraft with tactical weapons capable of leveling buildings of steel-reinforced concrete…AND, should you catch a whiff of street pizza in the theater (or maybe those banana-scented crystals like the janitor in grade school used to deoderize kid-barf loci), you’ll know just what happened.

Let’s hope it doesn’t happen to you. If you like disorienting carnival rides that possibly stink of vomit, you’ll probably be fine going to see Cloverfield.

Some viewers finding ‘Cloverfield’ nauseating to watch

Thousands of moviegoers were no doubt clutching their seats while watching Cloverfield, last weekend’s No. 1 film at the box office. A few of them were clutching their stomachs as well.

Since the movie opened Jan. 18, some patrons say they felt nausea and dizziness while watching the horror flick, much of which was filmed in a jerky motion with a hand-held camera.

Erika Hasegawa, 32, was watching Cloverfield at a theater in Los Angeles on Tuesday night but had to leave in the middle of the film.

“I’m really nauseous right now — just hold on for a second,” she said, before walking down the hall and retching in a trash can….

Read the entire article


“Hey, it’s a big freaky monster – where’s yer camcorder?”

Praise it

Flush This
*Probably not

Fish heads, fish heads…

…eat them up, YUM.

Barnes & Barnes famous (or infamous) old film, from the early days of MTV, before it sucked.

Praise it

Flush This