Tag Archives: disgusting

Trainspotting Toilet Scene (Caution!)

Some have speculated that the “Mr. Creosote Scene” from Monty Python’s The Meaning of Life (see below) is the most revolting in 20th century cinema. Having recently seen Trainspotting (1996) for the first time, I have to say it’s a serious contender; I find it far, far more revolting than Mr. Creosote.

Cautions:

  • If you haven’t seen the movie and you’re a fan of Ewan McGregor, you might want to skip this clip.
  • If you’re incapable of clinical detachment, and tend to retch when seeing revolting things, you should probably skip it.
  • If you watch it, and it severely grosses you out or ruins your dinner…well, I warned you.

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Mr. Creosote

WARNING!

The following scene is not for those with weak constitutions.

Wikipedia has this to say about it:

It has been suggested that the scene is one of the most repulsive in twentieth-century cinema. Director Quentin Tarantino has confessed to being nauseated by this scene, but critics with stronger stomachs have praised its dark humour. (Leonard Maltin noted it as “an unforgettable scene, like it or not.”) It was filmed in the Porchester Centre, a public building owned by the City of Westminster on Porchester Road, London.

FYI, Mr. Creosote is played by Terry Jones.

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Aussie Prime Minister has a snack

From 2007–

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An odious website

I’ll refrain from describing the following site, save for saying that it has mouseover sound-effects, and you should turn your speakers down, lest you get startled out of your seat.

bathroomlife.com

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Recipes: Liver Mush & Hog Lights Stew

These are genuine down-home recipes, taken from The Treasury of White Trash Cooking, by Ernest and Trisha Mickler.

LIVER MUSH

  • 1 hog liver, cut up, washed and picked clean of the membranes
  • 3/4 cups of coarse ground cornmeal
  • Salt & black pepper
  • 1 Tbsp thyme
  • 1 Tbsp sage
  • 1 tsp flake red pepper

Cook liver in salted water until tender. Drain and mash to a paste. Make a sluice of the liver and one cup of the liver juice. Put in a pot and bring up to a boil while adding the cornmeal, till it gits (sic) good and thick. Add seasonings. Scrape into a mold of some kind and let it get cold. Remove and slice. It’s a meal in one.

Comments: Sick. When I was a kid, my mom used to boil liver for the cat, and I can personally vouch for the fact that it stinks.

HOG LIGHTS STEW
(“lights” are the lungs and the liver of a pig, cooked together)

  • 1 set of hog lights
  • 1 large onion, chopped
  • 2 toes garlic, chopped
  • Salt and black pepper to taste
  • Flour

Chop your lights up into bite-size pieces. Fry down in a heavy pot with the onion and garlic till it is brown. Add water to cover, salt and pepper, and stew till tender. If it’s not thick enough for you, use a little flour to make it thicker. Spoon that over rice and some Scratch Backs* on the side, and you’re fixed.

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* Scratch backs are pig skin and attached fat, salted, rolled in cornmeal, and fried. They turn out very crunchy, thus the name “Scratch Backs” – they “scratch your back” going down.

Romance: Gone With The Wind

Sexy, or what?Quite a few years ago, my ex-wife worked with a young lady whose husband was beset by chronic flatulence. Apparently he had decided to embrace his condition, and so he would brazenly break wind and make rude comments about it, often in the most inappropriate social settings. For example, at my wife’s company picnic as we were eating, seated at picnic tables with various of her co-workers and their families, he would from time-to-time lift an ass-cheek, let one go, and say things like, “Whoa, you’d best get upwind from that one,” or “Smell the crack of the Earth…”

Charmed, I’m sure. I’d never seen anything like it. Despite my fascination with the vulgar, even I know where the line of propriety versus impropriety falls.

After we arrived home that evening, my wife told me that this odoriferous fellow, when at home with his wife, would cut enormous protracted farts beneath the bedclothes in the morning, and then forcibly confine the poor woman’s head underneath the blankets until she could hold her breath no longer.

This is tantamount to abuse to my thinking, but what’s worse is that she was beautiful. I mean, a tall, long-legged country girl descended from German milkmaids, with golden hair, sparkling blue eyes, and a face to lauch a thousand ships.

Sigh. There’s no accounting for taste. I guess there must have been something to love about the guy, despite the affrontery of his overactive butt.

The following article was the catalyst for my calling this stinky, stinky man to mind–

Sex life has gone with husband’s wind

Q: I AND my husband are having big arguments over his disgusting habit of getting into bed every night and then spending 10 minutes breaking wind, stinking out the room.After that, I obviously have no interest whatsoever in having sex with him.

He says it’s natural, but as I have pointed out to him many times, so is going to the lavatory, but no one would dream of doing it in the bed.

We have only been married for six months. He seldom did it when we were just engaged, but he says now we’re married, he wants to be able to relax in his own bed in his own house.

Read the advice columnist’s reply

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Putrified, Rancid Skate: An Icelandic Delicacy

 

Speaking of putrified skate, I had an opportunity to smell one, many years ago. I was on vacation in Long Beach, Washington, and while beachcombing one day, encountered a dead skate upon the beach. It was the worst goddamned thing I ever smelled. In fact, it became the standard to which I likened the smell of fresh-cooked lutefisk (which I haven’t written about here, yet).

Having had this experience, I shuddered involuntarily when I happened upon an article extolling the gustatory virtues of Skata, a “timeless” Icelandic standard, which falls under the loose and ill-defined category of “fermented animal products.” Quite simply, before cooking and consumption, the skate must be prepared by being “kept for weeks under stones and turf and then being hung out for drying in the cold climate.”

Sounds like rotten fish, to me. However, the author of the article “Strange Smelling Delicacy” at The Iceland Review online insists that “…it is by no means rotten or damaged. It is only fermented like cheese, and is very healthy…”

I would like to take a moment here to correct a misconception that this author is promoting, as countless others have done before him–

There are a number of animal-based foods from different parts of the world that are described as being “fermented.” However, the term is erroneous when applied to such foods because fermentation properly means the decomposition of carbohydrates, and since animal tissues are composed of proteins and lipids, and contain at most only traces of carbohydrates, the operative processes in the transformation undergone by these foods are actually putrefaction and rancidification. (source)

So, Skata, its “health benefits” and “gustatory delights” notwithstanding, is a putrified, rancid skate. Which is exactly what I would expect to result from burying a dead fish, and then hanging it out to dry. That’s why it’s “strong smelling.” Because it’s freakin’ rotten.

Me – I’ll opt for a nice fresh piece of halibut grilled in butter, any day.

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Nuked Dookie

Yet another odoriferous incident from the state in which I live, but this one much, much fouler than the story preceding this. In fact, you might not even want to read it if you’re not capable of “clinical detachment.”

Also, if you harbor any sort of misanthropic sentiments, this is not going to improve your overall opinion of humanity.

Foul Odor Leads to Shocking Discovery in Bremerton Apartment Building

BREMERTON

A foul smell that had been irritating tenants at an apartment building turned out to be an unkind gift left in the microwave.

An 87-year-old woman on Wednesday called Bremerton police to her apartment building on the 100 block of Lafayette Avenue North to tell police about the discovery, reports said.

The woman said on Monday evening she heard several complaints about the smell, a “foul odor.”

The woman looked for the source of the noxious stench, but was unable to find it until another resident told her it seemed to be emanating from a recreation room to which all residents have access.

The smell led her to the microwave.

“Inside the microwave, there was a substance that she determined was human feces,” the officer wrote in the report. “She said that it was not in any type of container and that it had been partially melted in the microwave.”

There were no suspects. The woman said she didn’t believe anyone in the apartment complex would do such a thing. (source)

How would you punish something like that? Any conventional penalty just doesn’t seem…well, creative enough.

Here’s a suggested warning label for microwaves, in case of “copycat crimes.”

Warning Label

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Boiled Cabbage

Boiled Cabbage

I wouldn’t even care to guess how many writers have used boiled cabbage as a device to evoke images of poverty and squalor. It’s doubtless an unfair bias, because not only is cabbage extremely nutritious, but it has been eaten equally by rich and poor, the world ’round.

Regardless of that, boiling cabbage does stink. You know it for sure, when someone who writes about a dish of pig intestines he seems to have enjoyed, and in the same paragraph refers to cabbage as “sewage smelling”–

The other notable dish at Founder Bak Kut Teh is the Pig Intestines or “Hoon Terng”. It was the mild with a nice chewy texture. Unfortunately, I do not like cabbage in soup as it adds, to me, a foul smell and taste. Try boiling cabbage in your kitchen, you’ll soon discover a rather distressing smell emanating from it. That’s the smell I do not like at all. To me, the intestines alone would provide a good enough twist to the original broth without the sewage-smelling boiled cabbage. (source)

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